Cara Colleen

hurtful things

Somehow, I still haven’t learned that the people I love are simply humans. It always surprises me when they do something I don’t expect and it hurts. I guess it’s a matter of expectation. Like it or not, I have my loved ones on pedestals of various height—depending on how close I am, how long I’ve known them, my past experiences with them, etc. With some my expectations are more realistic. With others, I have them up way too high. The higher they are, the harder I get hit when they tumble off.

In theory, at least, I fully recognize their humanity and weaknesses. But somehow the heart doesn’t always listen to the brain. I WANT the fairy tale to be true. The princess is always good and kind and perfect. So is the charming prince or the knight in shining armor on the white horse. The human beings in the real world may be princesses and princes and knights in my eyes, but they aren’t ALWAYS good and kind and definitely not perfect.

They fall off my unrealistic pedestals, totally unaware of the expectations that I have. They are simply being themselves and trust that I know their imperfections. I, on the other hand, have to learn all over again that my trust in anyone I love has to be based, not on that person, but on the rulership of Christ over our relationship.

Today I have agonized over another fallen friend. Someone fell. I got hurt. But somehow I love my friend still and I definitely trust that Jesus is Lord over the both of us. I know without a shadow of doubt that forgiveness is far better than resentment and bitterness. My tendency is to extend mercy and expect that mercy will be the instrument for both our healings, through the power of the Holy Spirit.

I have wept my tears, vented my anger, dried my eyes, and reestablished those oh-so-important lines of communication. Somehow I survive. I grieve. I let go. I seek healing from the Only One who can give it… Most importantly, I face again my own human weakness and imperfection. And I remember the advice of the Master. “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”

LESSON 8,637… OR SO